Fear of Intimacy


I was blindly chanting the affirmations for the last few days:

I release the part that ignores her”.

“I align with that part that loves her deeply and totally

I was surprised that I had been ignoring not only my wife, but in the past, my mother, my sister and my ex-girl-friend too. I think that’s why I had a break-up with my ex-girl-friend. I used to think she left me. Now, I realize I am the reason behind it.

Anyway, how do you know I was ignoring my wife?


The part that reacts to outside world (say, blaming others for your problems) is your outer-self.

The part that witnesses your outbursts is another self, which does the watching game and is the inner-self. Even when you react negatively, the inner-self is not worried. It keeps quiet.

When you keep releasing, you will go deeper and deeper and eventually you will touch the silent-self, which is beyond positive and negative.

Now, you have touched the silent-self for a little while. Because of that you have found out the truth that it’s your wife who’s reacting to you. So when you change, she will change too.

Now answering to your question, “How do you know I was ignoring my wife?”

Ignoring our loved ones shows we have a fear of intimacy – afraid to get closer to loved ones. Therefore, we use conflicts to get away from our loved ones, exhibiting our fear of intimacy.

Keep doing the affirmations for some more time, so that you will understand better and better how you are culprit behind your problems. In a way, this will stop your blaming (WILLOW) and make you take responsibility for your thoughts and actions.

This way, you will be empowered to take charge of your life.

Related Blogs:

Learn to manage your fears: http://wp.me/pwblL-3G

Fear manifests what we do not want: http://wp.me/ptUMq-3O

About Elsol

Naran balakumar is a herbalist practising bach flower therapy for the last 21 years. Naran is a Reiki master teacher.

Posted on October 9, 2013, in Conflicts Resolution, Family, Harmony, Love Life and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 8 Comments.

  1. Sir

    How to make my husband realise that he is ignoring me,taking me for granted & not giving me & my feelings,my desires any value respect.

  2. v,
    As per the above explanation from Naran Sir, you should chant:

    “I release the part that ignores him”.
    “I align with that part that loves him deeply and totally”

  3. But i dont igonre him he does so. He never cares what im feeling what i want. Sometimes he is lovable but mostly he just cares for my parents, he just want his parents.

  4. Sir,
    I had a relation before and the guy left me and now when in other relation here also its not working well ..inspite of giving my best…there is no harmony in my relationship…..and i dnt want to loose this person….i am already doing the forgiving exercise…..what should i affirm so that whatever is wrong within me get corrected….because i dnt ignore them …..its he who every time ignores me….plz sir guide me what should i affirm

  5. hy naran
    What can i affirm to find The suitable match of my desire and get marry to him with everyone’s blessing, and want to have loving blissful relationship. please reply.
    Thank you

  1. Pingback: Conflicts Inside Out

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