Blog Archives

Couldn’t get a divorce

Naran

Sridhar applied for a divorce, though his wife put all breaks to it, as she will get more share in the property if she is not agreeing for the divorce as per Indian Law.

He took Ruby pills. Soon after, he found out that his wife has a secret relationship with her ex-boyfriend which she had revealed in her Orkut. This evidence helped him to get an easy divorce.

Fear of Intimacy

Patient

I was blindly chanting the affirmations for the last few days:

I release the part that ignores her”.

“I align with that part that loves her deeply and totally

I was surprised that I had been ignoring not only my wife, but in the past, my mother, my sister and my ex-girl-friend too. I think that’s why I had a break-up with my ex-girl-friend. I used to think she left me. Now, I realize I am the reason behind it.

Anyway, how do you know I was ignoring my wife?

Naran

The part that reacts to outside world (say, blaming others for your problems) is your outer-self.

The part that witnesses your outbursts is another self, which does the watching game and is the inner-self. Even when you react negatively, the inner-self is not worried. It keeps quiet.

When you keep releasing, you will go deeper and deeper and eventually you will touch the silent-self, which is beyond positive and negative.

Now, you have touched the silent-self for a little while. Because of that you have found out the truth that it’s your wife who’s reacting to you. So when you change, she will change too.

Now answering to your question, “How do you know I was ignoring my wife?”

Ignoring our loved ones shows we have a fear of intimacy – afraid to get closer to loved ones. Therefore, we use conflicts to get away from our loved ones, exhibiting our fear of intimacy.

Keep doing the affirmations for some more time, so that you will understand better and better how you are culprit behind your problems. In a way, this will stop your blaming (WILLOW) and make you take responsibility for your thoughts and actions.

This way, you will be empowered to take charge of your life.

Related Blogs:

Learn to manage your fears: http://wp.me/pwblL-3G

Fear manifests what we do not want: http://wp.me/ptUMq-3O

Only person who can tolerate my wife

Naran

Husband thinks so. If you ask his wife, she will say that she is the only person who can tolerate her husband. I am talking about the couple I know here.

Both of them were consulting me for more than a year. They followed my instructions sincerely. Yet, the situation remained the same – they were continuing to fight with each other.

Then one day a miracle happened. The husband saw the blog I had earlier posted in WordPress: http://wp.me/ptUIO-2f.

He simply took the statement from the post – “I am not the doer. Divine is the doer”, as an affirmation and continued to chant it.

After few days of chanting his anger came down and felt his wife has born in this world for his sake, thanks to the divine, so that necessary healing can happen for him, and thereby his karma is nullified.

We might give remedies and healing techniques. Only divine decides which one will work. Divine’s way is too mysterious for us to comprehend in one lifetime!!!

Raining clouds

ATEWHS

I am in a relationship since last five years. I really like him very much with many ups and downs and many adverse conditions. I have been his constant supporter.

He too loves me but we are not able to bring forward this relationship into marriage as he is stocked in his divorce case. He is married since last eight years and his wife left him as she does not want to get married and was forced by parents.

He is fighting for divorce but now she wants a large amount of money to give divorce. Due to all this things he gets demotivated and he thinks my life is being spoiled. He step backs at times.

I am really tired of this behavior and I feel bad when he steps back.

Please help me with some switch word or mantra so that we both get together and our problems get sorted out.

Naran

Chant “CLOUDS TOGETHER DIVINE NOW”

Explanation

Like clouds that bring rains (happiness), let your life be filled with love and prosperity.

Good Spouse vs. Bad Spouse

Bad Spouse

Kavita

My husband has started defaming me on social networking sites now.Please let me know if I’ll ever be able to win back his lost love for me?

Naran

Do the forgiving exercise for him

Download a picture of Emerald and keep it under the pillow.

Chant AGRIMONY CRAB APPLE ADJUST TOGETHER CHANGE NOW

Good Spouse

D

At the end of a life of total sacrifice and devotion to her partner in dharma, didn’t mother Sita cry in anguish and say ‘Mother take me into your lap. I can’t take this anymore!!!’, till mother earth parted to gather her pain.

This was in spite of having the most revered person Sri Rama as her husband and it being a world of Truth (Satya Yug)!

If it is ball comes that comes back as pain and suffering (or joy and happiness) what ball did mother Sita throw?

She is referring, “Have a Ball of Love”: http://togetherrelationship.wordpress.com/2013/04/15/have-a-ball-of-love/ here.

Naran

The wonderful question!

Rama and Sita, yes they loved each other very intensely. Nothing can separate them. They had so much of trust in each other.

Then why did Rama deport Sita just for the sake of one dhobi (washer man) who questioned the chastity of Sita.

Is it because Ram also had the same doubt about Sita in him? No! It is a categorical no.

Rama’s love for Sita was so total and complete – we can also say they both represent the ideal husband wife relationship – that he could not have an iota of doubt at all.

Then why did he deport Sita to her utter dismay?

Rama was the one person who could understand the mass psychology better than anybody else.
Had he ignored the comment of the dhobi, thinking, “I know better? My Sita is beyond all this”, how many false stories would have been concocted, down the history tarnishing the image of Sita!

Because Ram did not want this to happen, he took the harsh decision against his own will.
For Rama, protecting Sita’s character was more important. Can anyone bear if his wife is blamed as characterless?

Think how tormented he would have been, before taking the decision.

Rama had total trust in her. He is happily bearing all the blames people have been inflicting on him, just for the sake of his love for Sita.

Sita’s name is more important for which he sacrificed his name, taking the blame on him. Rama’s action is the vindication of Divine love.

On the day of SRI RAMA NAVAMI (19-4-2013), let us have the blessing of the most Divine couple Sita and Rama SRI RAM JAYA RAM JAYA JAYA RAM.

Final Note

Look at the plight of the lady who has asked me a question. How much torture she would have gone through, when her own husband writes badly about her, in social websites? 

Conflict Resolution

Blogs by Naran S Balakumar

Resolving Conflicts with Your Spouse: http://healbyswitchword.wordpress.com/2013/01/16/resolving-conflict-with-your-spouse/

Getting out of Troubled Waters: http://healbyanimalspirits.wordpress.com/2009/04/17/jelly-fish-for-troubled-water/

My husband threw me out: http://healbymeditation.wordpress.com/2011/02/09/my-husband-drives-me-nuts/

I feel small, when he criticizes me: http://healbyrule.wordpress.com/2010/01/19/i-feel-small-when-he-criticizes-me-%e2%80%93-a-case-history/

Art of convincing your spouse and children: http://healbyanimalspirits.wordpress.com/2011/02/09/wolf-my-pal/

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